I Know So Little...

I'm taking this class with Matt-Intro to Urban Missions. And if you know us, you know this is something we are passionate about. We have this dream of moving into the city and being neighbors who care. We would love to have a house church with people of the neighborhood who might not feel comfortable going to the middle-class white church. Of course this is our dream, rather than a vision. Is there a difference? I'm not sure.

So we're in this class, together, because one-I wanted to be included in the seminary experience. It's strange to be on the "outside" of what my husband learns and is challenged with here at Fuller. And two--we thought (and still think) this class will help to clarify and encourage our passion for the city. But the deeper we get into this class, the more I read... the less I really know. And it's frightening.

I want to live in the city. It scares the crap out of my parents and a few other people, too. But that's where Matt and I want to be. And yeah, we'll raise our children there, too. But now I am beginning to realize how much I don't know. Yeah, i know squat! And it's funny because here I am, thinking i know "so much" and really, I don't. At least Matt has experienced living in the city (the Pink House, and Calaveras St.) and what do I have? Oh yeah, Paul ave. And Escalon for a brief 6 months. Both streets in suburbia.

I remember when I went to Urbana and heard Bart Campolo speak. He talked about the city needing neighbors to be just that, neighbors. And it sparked something in me. Why? I have no idea. I worked with Wise Old Owl for a few months and that was amazing!! But other than that and a spring break in an urban project, I have no experience in the city. But I still think the city is beautiful and my desire is to be in the city.

This Saturday we are taking a field trip to downtown LA. We get to take the metro (a city wide public transportation system) and tour the amazing historical aspects of the city that are often forgotten about. I'm excited. That--and I have a 1/2 marathon to run this Sunday and i'm happy to be done with that, too. I'm definetly not a runner. I prefer volleybal. (Sooo not the point.)

So... what do I do now? This class is an eye opener. And I'm eating it all up!! But I wonder if this will "help" our dream. I wonder if this is a stepping stone in the direction God wants us to go. Or is it just the popular thing to learn about, and then do nothing. That truly is my fear. I once was afraid of "the city" and God's heart for the city. It was a scarey place, crime inflicted, dirty, foreign. Now it's a place where I want to explore, hang out on the streets with the kids, be invited to the front yard BBQ's and get to know people and give them the respect and honor they deserve.

This class just might change the point of view in which Matt and I view the city and our future ministry there. Now I just want to be involved. I wish I knew where to start...

-Sara